Resolving Sibling Conflicts
Sibling rivalry is very common and not easy to resolve, but with a win-win-solution mentality, parents can help kids resolve most of their conflicts, especially wrestling over quantifiable or measurable things. Sometimes parents would hear their kids saying like this, “He got a new toy. I didn’t. My parents must love him more than they love me.” Generally speaking, kids perceive their parents’ love through acquiring something from their parents. However, the real needs of kids are parents’ love and attention basically. The ways they feel parents’ love are different of course.
Based on this understanding, we, as parents, can be very confident in resolving sibling conflicts.
Here are some parenting tips:
1. Take the win-win approach to let each side gain something. If they are fighting for concrete things, like toys, or measurable things, like the time you spend with them, it would be much easier to resolve. Let both sides have an equal share, and encourage win-win negotiations. Some children are too young and not yet at the stage of understanding the meaning of sharing.
2. It’s a headache indeed. Some people might suggest that parents should step aside and let children sort out by themselves. But it is not safe for your children, if you can’t see the whole process. For the first few times of conflicts, parents should act as the mediator to ensure fair share and teach them how to share.
Let’s begin from the beginning, the home. It is often said that the home is where the heart is. This is true because often times the home is where we first feel a sense of belonging, and stability. It’s a place where we come together and witness the joys and sorrows of life.
Parenting is hard. There is no doubt about that. Each of us as parents has struggled at some point in finding ways and solutions in helping our kids to grow up and become healthy, happy and productive adults. Understanding your parenting style is the first step to understanding why your children behave the way they do, and how you can improve your parenting skills. We will discuss three problems you might face as parents.
Authoritarian Permissive Authoritative
Giving in, giving orders, and giving choices, out of the three choices, there is one that is truly appropriate and effective. As we examine these three, see which parenting style you can identify with. See if that style proves to serve as a detriment or a benefit to your child.
We will talk about the benefits and also the disadvantage of these parenting styles, as well as learning nonviolent discipline skills with proven results for today’s kids. You will receive parenting tips on dealing with communication skills, parenting skills, discipline, power struggle and so much more. We also provide great resources on parenting books and referrals.
- Parenting in the 21st Century: What’s your style and how does it influence your child?
- We will discuss parenting goals, active parenting styles, and how our styles may prevent us from reaching our parenting goals and what we want for our children.
- Side stepping the Power Struggle: Redirecting your child's misbehavior.
- Whose problem is it – parent or child and is it unintentional or on-purpose misbehavior?
- Learn communication skills that help to solve problems without violence while strengthening the parent-child relationship.
- Effective Discipline: How to raise a responsible child.
- Learn proven nonviolent discipline techniques that also teach responsibility; explore how the “think- feel-do” cycle guides a child's decision - making process.
When parents speak with young children, alone or as a group, they must establish eye contact and/or hold them at close range, preferably at eye level, to maintain warm direct communication and rapport.
Siblings generally spend more time together during childhood than they do with parents.
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